When we last left off I wrote a letter of love to Mr. Ken while he was under the care of hospice. Now almost three months later I can bring myself to post this, page 2. I won't lie the words just wouldn't come, won't come. I searched through the blog and realized this last post from KL says almost everything I would have said....although admittedly the only dancing theme is the title song. I have to say though you can finish each paragraph with ...and we danced...
Up until the very last dance and on to today Mr. Ken was, quite frankly, the love affair of my life. I am not sure I will ever be that lucky again but I am sure that the memories I hold of him will stay with me for the rest of my life.
and here is "...I Had the time of my Life..."
It is the song phrase that keeps running through my mind as we are about to close this adventure and go on to the next or maybe it runs through because this month Patrick Swayze would have turned 60, but I digress, as usual...after hearing first thing this morning that the DES made it safe and sound to Houston our first stop was to tell Rogielyn goodbye. That was hard, she means so much to us! Our second stop was for a 90 minute massage, then back to the hotel for burgers and for me a two hour bath. Feeling all relaxed and ready for the trip our driver will pick us up at 4 p.m. and we will begin the long flight(s) back to Houston. By the time this posts we should be sitting in the business class lounge at Changi airport sipping wine! Now for the rest of the story...
Dear Kenny,
When we flew here in November 2009 on a house hunting expedition I admit I broke down and sobbed that this would be my new city of residence. Then when Ken moved here in January 2010 I have to say I went through a seemingly endless number of thoughts and emotions. Should I leave my career, sell my beloved family home, fly my even more beloved pet, and ship all of everything we own 10,000 miles from what I thought was our life - to live THERE? I will never forget my last phone call in the airport was with our realtor in Houston. He was letting me know that the paperwork for the house we sold and had signed off on had been inadvertently sent to Fallujah, Iraq for the buyers signature, by United States mail, instead of Federal Express. This did not make for a pleasant flight! (Side note - two months later we received the final signed documents and the money...until that time our house in Houston was neither sold nor for sale!) But, I digress...again!
My sweet (almost/soon to be) niece coined it this way - "What would you do for love?" (Hi Ashli!) I guess the short answer is leave my career, sell my beloved family home (or at least I thought it was sold!), fly my even more beloved pet, and ship all of everything we own 10,000 miles from what I thought was our life - to live HERE.
Then when I arrived here in June 2010, Desi arrived here (unscathed), later on the shipment arrived here I went about settling in to a very - how to say - unfriendly, poorly thought out and executed, house with three floors of marble, and a kitchen separated out on two different floors. A house that had a contractor in it weekly because so many things didn't work. But, I persevered. I learned to decorate in a whole new way and to cook in a totally new way! and, we danced....
Separating the bathroom from the bedroom so the view from the bed wasn't of...the toilet!
Carrying things up and down, down and up the stairs in order to prepare dinner! after which we truly did dance, often!
Rogielyn came to live with us which I believe was quite possibly the best decision we ever made! She is certainly the person I love most that I've come into contact with here. Leaving her is very difficult. Though I am sure she will be glad to stop washing my endless amounts of china, crystal and serving dishes! (Inside joke.)
And with her arrival, we traveled...ALOT. From August to September 2010 we hit Miri, Bali, Singapore and Western Australia. We ended up with some very dear friends in Singapore - Hi Jen & John - and some very dear friends in Perth - Hi Deb & Jack - who we visited often and had some great times along the way.
Then, October 5, 2010, we crashed down to earth with news of cancer. So, off we went to Houston for a few months. Thank (Praise!) God we are just shy two months to be two years since the news and Mr. Ken is still doing great! this is heart breaking to read but I have to say through it all we still remembered to dance...
We came back from Houston in early December 2010 with the added addition of our (first) broken ankle...his. Poor Des waited oh so patiently for us (and a haircut!) for two and 1/2 months!
I began to really find my way around KL and enjoy being here, driving, shopping, etc. We persevered through a few months of chemo and did quite a bit of traveling from February to April 2011. This time it was Western Australia and Singapore (again), London, Italy and Switzerland. where, we, of course, danced...
Then, Lauren arrived in April 2011. She hung out with us for eight months. We traveled to Western Australia, Singapore, Melaka, Cherating, Genting Highlands, and Langkawi while she was here. This trip to Perth, and our trip to Langkawi were perhaps two of the best vacations we have ever had. We had the added fun of meeting two long time dear friends in Langkawi, hi Mindy and Elod!
And sometime during Lauren's eight months here I broke my ankle! What are the odds of that seriously? Two in less than a year...We also had a lot of mischief at our complex with break ins and attempted break ins and alarms going off all night long...snakes in the house. But we persevered. Never a dull moment that is for sure! I loved every minute of it even if I didn't sleep much because, let's face it - it was great blog material! You just can't make this stuff up! and, no we didn't so much dance with the broken ankle...I couldn't manage the crutches or the stairs as it was!
When we got back from Langkawi in late October 2011, we found out we had to move to a different house, and we were SO happy about that. But first! We made a trip to Singpore and Western Australia in December to visit the aforementioned friends again.
We came back and got moved in a record 7 days start to finish! Being able to take Mr. Ken to the train every day and pick him up in the evening made his days much more pleasant, gave me a car all day every day so I improved my skill at getting around even more - AND Des got to ride in the car each way to the train, twice a day! An extremely, extremely good quality way of life....in a house we LOVED. We have ALL enjoyed this house if even only for nine short months! But probably no one more enjoyed it than the DES. (sorry, I realize this picture was in a recent post! I've been writing this last post from KL for about a week or more...at any rate I love this pic, clearly!) we had more fun in this house than anywhere ever...
Next, we took our long awaited and put off leave to Houston in February 2012. It was fun, but a bit too long to be gone.
My friend Sandra came from Ireland to visit in March! We had a great time...my one and only guest here in Malaysia! So, all the rest of you MISSED out!
We headed to Singapore and Perth (WA) yet again....
After that I hung at home and enjoyed the pets while Mr. Ken traveled...
Then we were off to Phuket in May 2012.
We received the news about coming back to Houston in June...And, now here we are (having just returned yet again from Singapore this month - dinner was great Jen & John!)... Packed and ready to move back. It truly seems like yesterday, and yet it seems like 10 years ago, I was on the plane worrying about the house sale in Houston. When we leave Mr. Ken will have been here 2 years, 8 months and I will have been here 2 years, 2 months.
If I had it all to do over again, knowing what I know now: I would have done my best to have been here in January instead of June 2010. I would not have worried so much about if what I was doing was the right thing or not. I would absolutely without a doubt have brought all of our things - despite the fact this is the third move in less than three years. And, I would have so sincerely rather have spent those six months dancing with Mr. Ken than fretting in Houston.
I guess when you sum it all up, I took a leap of faith based on letting my heart instead of my head decide, which is a very difficult thing for a person like me to do as I prefer all things logical...not emotional. And, well, it ended up that ...
Cue the music....
"...I had the time of my Life...and I owe it all to you..." Thanks Mr. Ken, I Love you.
To sum it all up. I have to say I did, truly, have the time of my life for 17 years. I saw the world with the man I loved. We had ups and we had downs but mainly we LIVED and we DANCED like no one was watching.
I feel assured Mr. Ken is enjoying his new adventure and I've decided I am ready to start mine. Knowing in my heart that he would want nothing more for me, I am secure in my wish to find happiness in this new chapter of my life.
To that end it is time for the spajunkie to retire. This will be her last post. I've enjoyed this blog and all of you more than I can say....
I ultimately wish that at this juncture I could write a blog called "Sex and the City Over 50" but in all reality that isn't going to happen! LOL. But some day soon my new blog will begin. It will be attached to this blog so that the spajunkie and her adventures with Mr. Ken will live on...
Look for "What the duck is up" coming your way soon!
All my love, spajunkie.
Danice, you've been a neighbor of ours for ten years, I still remember the day we met, but most of all you've been a friend, a true dear beloved friend, thru everything good and bad, you've been there openheartedly helping whether it was cooking for my entire family or just a phone call to say hey I'm here if you need me. I am so happy that you got this chance of a lifetime of amazing travels and experiences. I have to admit I was devestated when you told me you were leaving...like moving away and not just out of our neighborhood but out of the country! I believe I cried first when you told me. I am so glad you are coming back to Houston and can't wait to go to lunch and talk about all your adventures. We've missed you dearly (mostly Kayla & I)even though you've been 10,000 miles away you've only always been a click away. Hugs!
Posted by: Tearie Szydlo | 08/31/2012 at 01:25 PM
What a great chronicle of an amazing adventure! I have enjoyed reading about all your travels and adventures (well except the snakes in the house!) and have seen so many beautiful things thru your words and pictures! You truly have lived a dream that not many people get the opportunity to do. And you have such a gift of words! You have persevered thru bad times and good times with both grace and beauty. Thank you for sharing and I hope you continue to blog as you have such a way with words!! And I love hearing of Des's adventures!!
Welcome home!!
Debbie
Posted by: Debbie stark | 09/02/2012 at 08:57 AM
You are a truly gifted storyteller and it's been wonderful reading about all of your adventures. You are such a strong woman and Mr Ken would be so proud of you and your continuing love for him. I've loved seeing the world thru your eyes and reading about your journey. I look forward to reading about your new chapter of life. You are amazing and you have great things ahead of you. And you truly were blessed with a greater love than many will ever know. Sending you love and hugs, doll!
Posted by: Debbie | 10/30/2014 at 10:49 PM